Today, I’d like to present a series of baby/toddler-friendly games that Lily, Michael, and/or I have invented that Lily currently enjoys. I’m still working on the marketing, but these games are sure to be best-sellers.
Keep Away
Obviously, the Keep Away starter pack will include a set of actual items that toddlers and babies are not SUPPOSED to have, so you can spend your entire day trying to keep the baby/toddler from getting those items. The set could include real car keys, a working cell phone capable of dialing foreign countries, a particularly fragile laptop, a cat, a dirty diaper, a remote control to the television you are currently watching, and an open and full can of Diet Coke.
Instructions are simple:
Place items within reach of baby, and then forget about items or get distracted.
Then, either:
1) Notice baby is about to get item and race him/her to acquire it first. Winner gets to break it, choke on it, spill it, hug the stuffing out of it, and/or call a foreign country.
OR
2) Notice baby already has item, and race to prevent baby from further breaking it, choking on it, spilling it, hugging the stuffing out of it, or spending more time on the phone with their new best friend in Hong Kong.
Feel free to supplement kit with items of personal value to your family, and/or items that you find particularly gross or “icky” (i.e. a shoe that has recently tread on a horrifyingly sticky movie theater floor…*shudder*).
Keep Away - Bonus Pack
Includes one roll of toilet paper.
Instructions:
Place toilet paper in bathroom.
Attempt to keep away from baby.
Recognize that you will eventually turn your back, and you will lose this one.
THAT’S not a shoe!
As much as Keep Away can keep us busy for just HOURS on end, we also have a few new games we enjoy these days. One favorite is called, “THAT’S not a shoe!” (said in a silly, fake exasperated way…as if to say, “oh my gosh, you silly goose, I can’t believe you are trying to make that into a shoe!!!!)
And that’s the gist of the game.
Lily pretends that something is a shoe, holding it on her foot and saying “shoe” (or “shuh shuh shuh”) over and over again.
We make funny faces and say, “THAT’S not a shoe!”
She giggles and frantically searches for anything else within reach she can pretend is a shoe.
Repeat.
It’s actually a bath favorite. I kid you not. A crowd pleaser every time.
Kit will include random objects that in no way resemble shoes (washcloth, cups, rubber walrus, etc.).
Also available:
“THAT’S not a hat!”
Pretty much played the same way as “THAT’S not a shoe!” except that, you guessed it, Lily tries to put something on her head while saying “ha ha ha ha.” Can also be played by pretending something is a baby doll’s hat.
Warning: “THAT’S not a hat!” (which, I promise, is an actual game we play in the Bogle household – that we play these games is not a joke!) should not be played with macaroni and cheese.
Especially if you have hair.
Which, of course, we don’t. But it’s still kinda gross.
Baby Soup
This provided a whole weekend of fun.
Instructions:
Take one container.
Add baby. (Note: Kit would not include the baby)
Encourage (i.e. allow, since it really takes no encouragement because it was her idea) baby to spend ridiculous amounts of time stuffing balls in the container they are sitting in.
When finished, baby will then start throwing the balls out.
Give the balls back to the baby so they can put them back in the container all over again.
Duck.
When baby finally tires of putting balls in and out of container, try variations of peek-a-boo (another fan favorite around here).
Peek-a…
Boo!
Peek-a…
Peek-a…
Boo!
Not pictured: Endless transferring of balls from one container to another with a ladle.
Lih! Lih! Lih!
As I’ve covered previously, Lily loves putting lids on containers, and that remains a very popular activity in the house. We actually call this:
…her hobo cart, and refer often to her baby hobo supplies. Poor little darling has a shopping cart full of lids and cups and tupperware, and she just loves it.
Lid! Lid! Lid! (a.k.a. Lih! Lih! Lih!) can entertain forever around here. Instructions on how to keep your child from melting down when they spot a dirty lid in the dishwasher not included. But, you know, if you happen to have a set of those instructions just laying around your house, feel free to send them here for inclusion in our kit!
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I think that’s probably enough for our first offering of baby and toddler games. I’m sure these will really take off once we get our packaging and advertising together. Bonus sheets will come with every order, with such tidbits as:
How to pretend to give Daddy (and every living and non-living thing, not limited to even non-living things that might look like living things such as baby dolls, but also non-living things that don’t even remotely resemble living things like airplanes and strollers) drinks and food
How to wrestle giant beach balls into submission
How to charm your way out of trouble for making a huge mess with staining blueberry juice
And finally…
How to pretend you’re a sweet baby angel who always sits and plays quietly so that no one will suspect that it’s actually you who makes all the noises and mess around the house
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